The Toddler in You

That day, when you first stepped into your Primary School, your first day as a no-more-pre-school kid, I felt a rush of nostalgia. A few days before, I had seen you march around the flat like a soldier, putting your hand to your forehead and saying "Yes, Sir!". I was suddenly transported to the first few months in Scotland, when we played alot of marching up and down to the tune of "The Grand Old Duke of Yoke". There was a shadow of the toddling you in there. And I wished I had not been scolding you so much these past few months - on your attention span, on your whining, on your unwillingness to help out around the house, on your seeming callousness after you accidentally knocked your sister to the floor, on your dilly-dallying. Oh, on so many things we thought you should be outgrowing. But in actual fact, you are still a child.

Ethan, the days ahead may be exciting and a little overwhelming for you. You are likely going to face some set backs, and some wonderful adventures and discoveries too. I see your life as an individual person, being on your own, beginning. And I hope you'll look forward to the days ahead, to the opportunities abound for growth and learning and gaining more and more independence. As for me, I'm just going to miss those younger days more and more, the carefree and almost trouble-free childhood that you had, those long walks that we did together in Edinburgh, the long afternoon sun and hours spent on those activity books with a sleeping Jethro. Which you have forgotten, and I won't ever.